Justin of Beavers

Tidigare i år skrev jag ett inlägg där jag tog upp fenomenet Justin Bieber-hat bland hårdrockare på Youtube. Oavsett vilken hårdrocksvideo man än tittar på så finner man massvis av kommentarer som “I hate Justin Bieber”, “This is so much better than that faggot Justin Bieber”, “Justin Bieber shall burn in hell” eller kanske “69 people likes Justin Bieber” om en hårdrocksvideo har 69 s.k. “dislikes”.  För egen del var hårdrock och metal en tonårsförälskelse som fortfarande ligger mig varmt om hjärtat. Samtidigt gillar jag inte alls Justin Bieber. Men jag tjatar inte om hur jag hatar Justin Bieber när jag lyssnar på Metallica för det. Det är som om dessa headbangers har blivit besatt av en tvångstanke att de måste bekräfta sin manlighet och icke-bögighet genom att vädra sitt hat gentemot Justin Bieber. För att göra dessa fans nöjda har jag skrivit en alternativ text till Metallicas gamla klassiker “Master of Puppets”. Jag kallar den nya tappningen “Justin of Beavers” och så småningom lär en inspelning av den dyka upp också!

 

End of passion play
Biebering away
He’s your source of self-destruction
Ears bursts as he play
‘Cause he’s so fuckin’ gay
Feeding on your soul-abduction

And how it’s eating me
When he sings “Baby”
Dedicated to
Faggots just like you

Give him your trustin’
Obey your Justin
You’re life he’ll be bustin’
Obey your Justin, Justin!
Justin of Beavers galls on your trees
Waving his tail and smashing your knees
The worst of plagues since the Bee Gees
Save us from his contagious disease!
Justin, Justin!
Save us from his contagious disease!
Justin, Justin!

Queerwork all the way
Never you betray
That you’re turning’s getting clearer
Soon you’re fancy dressed
And by fashion so obsessed
Spending hours by the mirror

And how it’s eating me
When he sings “Baby”
Dedicated to
Faggots just like you

Give him your trustin’
Obey your Justin
You’re life he’ll be bustin’
Obey your Justin, Justin!
Justin of Beavers galls on your trees
Waving his tail and smashing your knees
The worst of plagues since the Bee Gees
Save us from his contagious disease!
Justin, Justin!
Save us from his contagious disease!
Justin, Justin!

Bustin’, bustin’, where’s my friend that you’ve been bustin’?
Bustin’, bustin’, they all turned away!
Justin, Justin, all I hear or see is Justin!
Justin, Justin, the world’s gone mad and gay!
Save me!

Now I’ve got to flee
From AIDS and HIV
You bet this beaver is contagious
Comfirm that I’m a man
And not a crazy fan
Cheering sissy and outrageous

He will occupy
And my ass he’ll fry
He will pull it through
Right up number two

Give him your trustin’
Obey your Justin
You’re life he’ll be bustin’
Obey your Justin, Justin!
Justin of Beavers galls on your trees
Waving his tail and smashing your knees
The worst of plagues since the Bee Gees
Save us from his contagious disease!
Justin, Justin!
Save us from his contagious disease!
Justin, Justin!

 

Det är roligast om man har lyssnat på låten “Master of Puppets” innan eller om man lyssnar på den samtidigt som man läser texten.

 

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About milkaddiction

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